It's been 2 months and 10 days.
So far, she still loves me, and I still love her. She always tell me that she loves me very much, almost everyday, which I'm very happy about. She always set my soul on fire. It is not just a little spark, it is a flame. A big and roaring flame...
These days, my school really experience shits, most of them relates to my class and the new juniors. I won't be talking about them, as they are really useless for me. What it matters now is that, some weird lady in a black BMW stops infront of our school and take picture of students coming out for lunch in the opposite food court. What the fuck is the lady doing?? What I really worried the most is that she is helping 'someone' to take picture and decide who to kidnap. And I really worry about the most is my girl of course. She usually across the road with 2-3 friends that are girls only. I'm not trying to discriminate females for their strength, but still, if something like kidnapping happened to them, what can they possibly do? By the time others reach their destination, they will be... gone....
I have enough of losing people that is close to me, and I'm not gonna lose another one, ESPECIALLY this one. I can't tell my girl to stop going out with her friends... Though she always go in a group of 5 or more, still... I really feel like I should be by her side all the time... But that would me to take her freedom with friends away.... So should I do something about this?..
I'm the type to prevent everything,do anything to prevent future regrets.If I don't want to wait until something happens and in the end regrets it, hoping that I can move back in time and stop everything. I take today as my future, means I take today as if I have gone back in time from future, and therefore, I must prevent shits from happening. So it's more a like... I want to do something about this... Which... would in result.. make her hate me.... I don't want that to happen... What I want is just to keep her safe...
Just like daughter/son and father. I can't trap her in my arms and tell her I should be by her side, everywhere she go.
I told her that I prefer her to be in groups of 5 or more.. And she said 'we'll see about it.' See? What is there to see? I mean like... I really love her and I want her to be with me forever. I really don't want to let her face the chance of getting into this mess. Even if the chance that this would happen is 0.0001%, I still would not allow her.... But I want her to be with her friends as well... I want to be by her side every time, but I believe it would really weaken her friendship bond with others....
I'm really very selfish..... I just want her to be by my side every time now... I wonder where this is taking me... Is this... just another trap in my life? Oh my lord.... I really hope nothing happens between me and her..
Ascending