'When we reached our lowest point,
'We are open to any changes.'
-You Know Who-
I don't know where to begin. I really have forgotten about what i wrote before this. But no matter...
I'am the type of person who cannot control his feelings. I don't know what emotion should i show, things to say and etc. Sometimes I do care about it, and sometimes not. And now... it's not.
I've been quite carefree these months. I feel like... unusually calm. I am calm, that's a good thing. But being calm, makes me wonder sometimes. Why do I feel a little stranger... I felt like... there's this thing that I don't want to remember. I never felt this calm before for quite a long time... There has to be something... My life is not that long yet, so i should be able to remember things that happened before. But the thing is, why do i want to remember something that i don't want to remember? What will I gain from this?
So back to the main topic of this damn blog. I 'm not sure about how much has it been progressing since 2 months ago. I haven't been paying much attention to this matter since I have important exams. I'm quite happy of myself that i can still put my studies as my main priority... But that reminds me.. i remember that time last yea, where i have to suffer like hell due to my stupidity and never care about my studies... And i got quite a satisfying result for myself. 7As and 1B... I never get this much As before in my report cards.
Not sure to call that lucky.
Back to the progress... Me and her went out together for 2 movies in 2 different days. Quite surprising for her to invite me out... I remember she kept on asking me to talk to her... like say something... And from there I realize that Im a boring person. But when I asked her if I am boring, she said I am an interesting person. Well.. perhaps she was just... you know, white lie? And at one occasion, she said she's alright just to go out with me again, just the 2 of us.
If this happens back then with that one girl and with my old disgusting behavior... my goodness, i might die due to happiness overload.
I AM happy with this one too, without her I'm kind of... more alone. Im not sure.. but should I take a chance on her? Maybe friendzoned already, but it's not like it is super impossible to get out of it right? Well.. I'll decide it later.
Yesterday I randomly browse through my files, hidden files cause Im bored. I have a file, named 'Forbidden Things'. I don't quite remember what is in it. When I double clicked it, it says i have to enter the password. I hands just magically entered a code without my consciousness.
I see some pictures... and those pictures... I remembered back... those feelings.. THOSE FUCKING FEELINGS! No wonder I wrote FORBIDDEN FILES as it's name....Just those fucking feelings....That fucking whore... damn...How could I not remember these feelings..
-A Forgotten Partita-